Monthly Archives: September 2023

Reflective commentary #7

My work in past month and more has had a heavy bias towards my dissertation as I try to get on top of my ideas for this work and at same time attempt to force myself to stay on topic and stop wandering. As this a major element of this unit, I feel it very important to reach a tipping point where I am happy with my overall ideas and rest of work on essay will be an editing process. The coursework at this point asks for a first draft of my dissertation. What I have been working on for the past few months feels well beyond a first draft and has been through many different iterations and revisions. Whatever number I assign to these drafts, I am much happier with my efforts than I was several months back and even though it still isn’t complete, it feels that my argument and flow of this written work is developing. Future drafts will continue my work to edit and refine my argument further as this draft is too long and needs a conclusion and abstract and some illustrations. As I edit this further, I will drill down as I have a sense that I have repeated some of my points. My essay seems to have much more of my own comments and opinions although I am not consciously aware of changing my approach. As suggested by tutor, I have incorporated my footnotes into the body of my text. The most useful advice I received was in writing to help me discover so I have been researching and exploring all at the same time, my efforts being driven by what I write. Interestingly, I been seeing connections between my essay and my creative test pieces. My writing is developing as I been searching for the flow of my essay, trying to make it logical and readable. I am not the most cultured writer so this been time consuming but at the same time, enjoyable and, I hope, depending on my choices for future study, will be a useful skill to develop.

Tutor feedback on the rough draft containing my introduction and the first chapter with ideas for the rest of essay at feedback point 4 were instructive although it took me a while to absorb what had been said and to try and shape my ideas for my dissertation and to take that feedback on board. Major changes in essay are that my original introduction now forms a part of my second chapter where I explore the liminal space surrounding death. It is here I have decided to give my daughter a voice. My revamped first two chapters and a new introduction is where the bulk of my essay has developed. My chapter on death as a taboo is now my final chapter. Having said this, I have thought of this less as chapters, but more as joined up work which lean upon one another.

Feedback #6

As I write this, I have received feedback from eight students which has grown. My first peer feedback had four responses and the last one, five responses. I think it worth commenting on the standard of the feedback. This has grown and developed and is more and more helpful to me and at the same time, more time consuming to absorb this. Whether this due to educational journies of my peers or is in part due to feeling more comfortable and aware of my work am less sure. Maybe a combination of these things.

My first responder commented about my initial image this month as being “quite powerful and not a little disturbing”. This is what I was aiming for as a work investigating liminal death space. I do wonder how much of the impact might be visual and how much because my peer group now know my back story to this project? Additional comments from this student about my ideas of texture and maybe of using layering up physical things which might bring another sense of texture. This seems similar to a previous tutor who commented that he enjoyed the tactile sense of my physical pieces. The student recommended the work of Miho Kajioka and her textured work created in darkroom so produce analogue prints which are regarded as not only images, but also as objects. I will investigate this work further. One final point here was perhaps arguing against placing too much value in feedback. My work relates my experiences and studies to my creative works but that the intensity and strength of the emotional depth is what should lie at the heart of my work.

Comment from another student; my initial image produced a sense of the liminal space which this student imagined as fading to nothingness. My image created a sense of “active disappearance” with its lack of colour, the roughness of the texture and the haziness of the presentation. The sense of the photograph itself as fading to nothing and being a “victim of demise”. The student commented that this is like memory. One suggestion was to consider exploring my imagery from the perspective of my daughter. I would have to think on this as it would strip out the photograph as a tool memory as the dead have no memories. One final comment was on construction of my image and in the layers and outlines of album images. I have been exploring this in many different ways. One idea was to use this outline on the raw plasterwork I use in many of my images. A final thought was that my best work seems to come hand in hand with periods of feeling lost and disconnected. I love this idea that only in the place and mood of the liminal space am I best placed to interact with it.

Another student commented that my theme seems well developed and clear. My ideas of layers of memory and loss seemed to him to work well with idea of liminality. He spoke of my ‘world view’ and of death as an end and that he didn’t agree. I felt that some of the comments here related to his own work rather than specifically to mine but was interesting all the same. I suppose that if death wasn’t an end, that would drastically change my sense of the liminal death space.

A fascinating comment next about whether the “infinitely depthless surface of our monitors with the electro-neural processing of the brain being mirrored by the internal process of our devices…”  This a very interesting comment. Is the starting point for liminal space our computer screen or the surface of our phones? A surface that is flat and shiny with finger prints. Do the smudges and finger prints hint at something beyond that which is contained and displayed on these screens? The student commented on difference between works with real texture and those with a digital texture. They also suggested trials with colour album photographs to see how that changed the feeling. Lastly they wondered about my graphical images of child perched on edge of a cliff and suggested the scale of this would be interesting maybe in a gallery setting making the cliff really big. I might further explore this idea with other high places such as buildings or maybe famous tourist spots such as the Eiffel Tower.

The next piece of feedback thanked me for my words expressing the challenges of home study. They raise issue of time and of art withing academic structure. I think I agree that the time limits of a course contain and shape our endeavours. I suppose they also help produce a way of working which in the future we can follow or reject as we please. Once again, the favoured image was first one I presented. Comment was that it reminded student of dreams with fragmented memories randomly (or seemingly randomly) fitted together. My work reminded student of early spiritualists and surrealists and of an auro left behind by the body. My idea of texture was interesting but how was this framed through use of words which made the idea more sensible. How would it have appeared with no words? Walter Benjamin and Lacon were mentioned along with “Liminal Landscapes” by Hazel Andrews and Lee Roberts.

Very interesting feedback from another student. They spoke of folk tales and the symbolism around the creation of the world – https://spiritsofthewestcoast.com/pages/native-american-symbols

Loose threads of memory and the survivors of war and Jan and Aleida Assman’s theory on cultural memory –

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cultural_memory

And Kubler Ross abd research into grief –

https://www.ekrfoundation.org/5-stages-of-grief/change-curve/

I had a quick look at this. It seems to eb one of these ideas about the stages of grief which I am very wary of as many of these the end stage is where we “recover” or are “healed” from the state of grief. I do however love the colours within her charts tracking the emotions around grief. A very interesting idea could form from that.

An interesting outcome from looking at my work was sense that there was a disconnect for them and that they had difficulty connecting my images with liminal space and that the children in my images are lacking context. These too distanced from the ideas of life and death. One suggestion was around how my story is told whether in an old sense or a modern sense? Is this down to taste or a wider sense? I will think on this.

The next student’s comments were more emotional based around the feelings, empathy and friendship. They comment on the suffering of those who remain, “Memory supports the bridge which, however, crumbles underfoot, just as the sharpness of the images, which fade, overlap and blend.” A very thoughtful and emotional response worthy of thinking about. If my work capable of producing such a response then would feel very proud.

Interestingly, none of the comments from students picked up on my use of text so I wonder if this ineffective in communicating my ideas. Interesting too, that my idea of texture as a tool of the image rather than as an expression in words. Yet at same time many students commented on my words and how they took meaning from what I said. I wonder about a test piece exploring liminality is a creative sense using words in an image?

Reflective comentary #6

This has been a difficult period in my studies. My work was frustrating me and seemed slow and, in some regards, does still feel slow to me. I felt I was being pulled in different directions by the demands of learning and the mental stresses of my project. My collaborative work and trying to understand how specific strands within these projects interfaced with my research to date, thinking about this with respect to my dissertation and, of course, fitting in home life. At the same time as this, I acknowledge that my work in dealing with personal loss means that I sometimes feel low which is normal but that doesn’t make it easier to deal with. I felt as if I had locked myself away trying to figure out this puzzle and was beating my head against wall which isn’t always the best for mental health. I worried about why I was having such doubts at this period in my studies. Shouldn’t my thoughts be nailed down by now? I had periods when I wasn’t putting pen to paper, or camera to eye, and was instead thinking. I now feel that this dark period has had some positive outcomes as things are starting to coalesce and make more sense and I am coming back into the light. I am still busy but have found a different perspective and sense of direction.

I have been spending time writing my dissertation which has involved drafts and redrafts, corrections, replanning, doubting myself and scratching my head but also of progress and a sense that things are maybe starting to flow. I have also been working on collaborations for my external facing project. This has involved creative test pieces but also research, looking for joins between what I been working on so far and these external influences on my work. The collaborations have started to spark different ideas and at the same time made me revisit some of my own ideas around memory and loss and the space between life and death which encompasses grief.

I think, for my fellow students reading this, the message I would like to give, from my own experiences so far, is that none of our work exists in complete isolation. The lonely ride that is home study comes with opportunities for help whether from tutors or, as we are lucky enough to have, a good peer group with different experiences and ideas and the confidence to shout out and offer criticism and feedback while at the same time not being judgemental and to share a laugh, which I think is a neat trick.

I asked for peer feedback on my creative test pieces alongside which I have given some written thoughts on my work. I decided that posting my research or my dissertation to this peer group was too much of an ask. the feedback on my creative works came back from 10 different people which was really impressive but at the same time, was time consuming for me to unpick and try to make sense of what had been written and to think before I decided whether to accept or reject this feedback. As I worked on this feedback I decided that i had made the right choice not to trouble my peers with too much written work.

Link to latest creative works –

https://richarddalgleish.net/liminal-test-pieces-3/

In addition, I provide a link to the feedback received from my peers on my creative test pieces –

https://richarddalgleish.net/2023/09/05/feedback-6/