This has been a difficult period in my studies. My work was frustrating me and seemed slow and, in some regards, does still feel slow to me. I felt I was being pulled in different directions by the demands of learning and the mental stresses of my project. My collaborative work and trying to understand how specific strands within these projects interfaced with my research to date, thinking about this with respect to my dissertation and, of course, fitting in home life. At the same time as this, I acknowledge that my work in dealing with personal loss means that I sometimes feel low which is normal but that doesn’t make it easier to deal with. I felt as if I had locked myself away trying to figure out this puzzle and was beating my head against wall which isn’t always the best for mental health. I worried about why I was having such doubts at this period in my studies. Shouldn’t my thoughts be nailed down by now? I had periods when I wasn’t putting pen to paper, or camera to eye, and was instead thinking. I now feel that this dark period has had some positive outcomes as things are starting to coalesce and make more sense and I am coming back into the light. I am still busy but have found a different perspective and sense of direction.

I have been spending time writing my dissertation which has involved drafts and redrafts, corrections, replanning, doubting myself and scratching my head but also of progress and a sense that things are maybe starting to flow. I have also been working on collaborations for my external facing project. This has involved creative test pieces but also research, looking for joins between what I been working on so far and these external influences on my work. The collaborations have started to spark different ideas and at the same time made me revisit some of my own ideas around memory and loss and the space between life and death which encompasses grief.

I think, for my fellow students reading this, the message I would like to give, from my own experiences so far, is that none of our work exists in complete isolation. The lonely ride that is home study comes with opportunities for help whether from tutors or, as we are lucky enough to have, a good peer group with different experiences and ideas and the confidence to shout out and offer criticism and feedback while at the same time not being judgemental and to share a laugh, which I think is a neat trick.

I asked for peer feedback on my creative test pieces alongside which I have given some written thoughts on my work. I decided that posting my research or my dissertation to this peer group was too much of an ask. the feedback on my creative works came back from 10 different people which was really impressive but at the same time, was time consuming for me to unpick and try to make sense of what had been written and to think before I decided whether to accept or reject this feedback. As I worked on this feedback I decided that i had made the right choice not to trouble my peers with too much written work.

Link to latest creative works –

https://richarddalgleish.net/liminal-test-pieces-3/

In addition, I provide a link to the feedback received from my peers on my creative test pieces –

https://richarddalgleish.net/2023/09/05/feedback-6/